"Feed the Birds - Tuppence a Bag"

My brother Joseph: "Keen, are you blogging about how you suck at feeding the bird?"

Me: "Yes Joseph."

Mom: "She's blogging about how she keeps me young by giving me extra work to do."

THE SCREENPLAY:

18.45: Mom asks me to feed the family bird who is starving. 

18.46  Bird: "I'm starving."

KIDDING. This is our bird: 

BIRD: "Yo. It's feeding time. You know what to do". ... (Or do I)

THE PLOT THICKENS


18.48 Dutiful daughter goes to get bird food, opens a new bag - and then this happens:

18.51: Typical.

18.52: Let's get a close up of that. This is abstract art baby. ABSTRACT.

18.54: Then I move the bag to try and catch the seeds, and this happens.. PERFORMANCE ART BABY!

18.55: Mom steps in to try and clean up the mess. Because I'm 12.

19.00: I've moved on. 

Mom isn't even mad - she's DISAPPOINTED.
And even worse - the seeds got stuck in the sifter and now she's trying to unblock it with a knife.
It's 19.04.

FIN

Mom's World

Greetings from Canada.

As we enter another kitchen...

Mom's.

My mother can drive me nuts, but at the end of the day I'm crazy about her - and she is such a HUGE inspiration for me. When she does something - she goes all the way and has taught me the same. In almost everything: school, art, music, dance, sport, work, everything - with of course the exception of the kitchen ; )

Perfect homemade meatballs. 

Perfect homemade cookies. 

Perfect homemade cookies stored in old fashioned Christmas cookie containers. 

Perfect little deer decorations lit up in the backyard (grazing in the snow).

In case we forgot that Christmas is about the birth of baby Jesus - Mom has no less than five nativity scenes strategically placed throughout the house. I bring you - what everyone always wants to see.. the baby!

Jesus glued to the nativity scene and being watched over by two cows.

Jesus handed down from Nana. RIP Nana.

Jesus bought from an expensive store. Can't say where, Dad will get upset when he finds out he cost $200.

Mexican baby Jesus. I got him and his family from Guadalajara.

Who could this little glass baby be? JESUS.

and for the finale..... tonight Mom asked me to set the oven timer for 15 minutes... A short while later she asks - "Caterina, why has this only gone down a few seconds?? Oh, it's because you set it to 

15 hours!!!"

Merry Christmas : ) !

Hugs from Canada - one of the best places in the world to spend Christmas - and then leave before the six months of ice and snow drive you mad.

Cold, Hard, Reality

Mom Shows Me How It's Done for the #76545676 Time

I know I haven't been blogging - I'm just getting bored with the whole cooking thing. It's not sticking. It's exhausting. ugh, I'm whining I know. On top of that, I'm not even in Franck's Kitchen anymore - I'm in my Mom's and she doesn't even think I know how to properly wash lettuce.


What's the point of even trying. 


And then today, after waking up at 5am and going to work at her super important/stressful job - she came home, made coq au vin, a tiramisu and then at 8 when I was using the "I'm jet lagged" excuse to not clear the dishes and go to bed, she announced - I'm going to the basement to work out and then iron for an hour.

No, you don't go from the below cake to this in a week. You go from the below cake to your mother's house and try and forget about the past while diving head first into pure sin.